I Only Hate the Algorithm Because It Doesn't Understand Me
If targeted ads were genuinely interested in My Interests
This is the next article following a recently self-proclaimed proverb, ‘Spending money on myself is not the same as paying attention to myself’ born from observing how much we’ve normalized buying our way to and from almost anything. And how just because we can, we really should choose not to.
I’ve recently transcended annoyance to apathy in my daily journey of Being Someone Who Is Online. I can finally articulate the change in social media: there’s not enough socializing and too much media-ing. When content must meet commercial criteria for monetization, there isn’t space for interaction anymore.
I just wanted to watch my long distance besties living their lives, not that new [clothing brand] x [another brand in a different industry] collab, even if it’s kinda dope and interesting.
I just wanted to share with my own friends and family the little things I find beautiful, delightful, fun and worthy of documentation, not the new cutie handbags for the season by every leather goods company new and established.
I just wanted to express myself with parts of my creative process with my community, not have a human being I’ll never meet try to sell me the latest skincare routine I “must” employ because “[they’re] so obsessed with it because it’s so good”.
I just wanted to see what fellow creators are interested in these days and celebrate their successes, not feel confused over a performative Reel that buys them Reach but has us both looking at the screen with dead eyes because they’re just using the same format as someone else who went viral that we’ve all been forced to see.
I do need to remember I can choose time and space undistracted. Or resting, dreaming, creating.
I do need to turn towards the deep wealth of health in being able to become honestly aware of and attuned with my bodies (plural because our physical, emotional, mental and spiritual all have their own languages — they are so highly intelligent and want the best for me). Especially in the dysregulation of ads or the news trying to garner a reaction that will make them more money and me more susceptible.
I do need to prioritize the richness of my relationships, including the one with myself. I’m informed by it day to day. If something is incompatible or imbalanced it’s up to me to add, subtract, adjust accordingly.
I do need to be the whole human that will always be undefinable by what media and algorithmic mechanisms can encapsulate in a moment in time. We all have been and will continue to be. We just need to stop forgetting.
My apathy occupies a place beside peaceful gratitude: an algorithm will never know me the way another human being can.
Targeted ads may infect my feeds but my head and heart spaces are already occupied.
When we reject algorithmic suggestions for what we want and need by default, how do we actually live our lives?
